As a parent, I would say paying for college was on my top 10 lists of worries as my children entered high school. We were caring for my elderly father and great aunt, along with battling with breast cancer. It was all we could do to stay afloat with medical and elder care expenses breathing down our necks every month.

My son was looking at a military career, but I knew he wanted to go to college. He also knew that we could not afford to contribute. My daughter was two years behind him, and I knew she had her heart set on Boston University, an expensive private college in the northeast. I worried day and night that her dreams would not materialize, and my son would have few options other than joining the military out of high school.

My children were not first generation students. However, I did not attend college, and my spouse attended a local college that basically accepted anyone who applied. I was lost. My circle of friends were not college graduates and were not encouraging their kids to apply to college. My parents did not encourage me to attend college, so I was clueless about the process. I had no idea where to turn for help and the school counselor was responsible for hundreds of students at a large public high school. She had little time to advise students about colleges and even less time to help with figuring out how to pay.

Dealing with all the family drama and concerned about finances, my son made the decision during his junior year to join the Marines. I was supportive but worried the decision was forced on him because he felt he had no other option. The day he signed a letter of intent, I decided to focus the next few years on my daughter’s dream—attending college.

I knew I had to research colleges, look at finances, and make sure she had a stellar academic and extracurricular record to back up her applications. When she entered her senior year, we had a plan. Here’s what we did: