Category Archives: parenting

mom approved tips, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: Navigating College Roadblocks

roadblockParenting isn’t for cowards. Every day brings new challenges and new drama, especially if you’re living with a college bound teen. Navigating college roadblocks can be tricky at best, but as with any difficulties, anticipating the possibilities can help you face them with confidence.

Your college-bound teen tells you that she simply MUST go to Private College A, even though she knows it comes with a high price tag.

Don’t let her bully you into sending her to a college you can’t afford AND one that will require a tremendous amount of student loan debt. Sit her down and explain to her the dangers of graduating in debt. Use the college repayment calculators if you have to. If she truly wants to go to Private College A, she needs to do the work (good grades, good SAT/ACT scores, great essay) to be awarded scholarship/grant money from that college. If not, there are always other options and choices.

Your college-bound teen is not interested in college or any other path that leads him toward higher education.

If there is one thing I learned with both of my kids (and clients), if they aren’t invested in the college process they won’t be invested in college. Save yourself some time, money and heartache and wait until they are. If not, they can learn from the college of hard knocks–minimum wage jobs are the BEST motivator!

Your college-bound teen misses deadlines, panics and comes running to you at the last minute to fix it.

The simplest way I know to avoid missing deadlines, is to get yourself a huge wall calendar and a fat red marker. Put it in a place that they have to pass by every single day. In addition, with all the smartphones and calendar apps available today, missing a deadline should be a thing of the past. At some point (hopefully when they go to college), they will have to fix their own problems. Let them do it now, while they live at home, and it will be easier for them once they are gone. Rescuing your kids all time only makes them into dependent adults and colleges aren’t impressed with those type of students or the parents that come with them.

Your college-bound teen suddenly announces she is not ready for college and wants to take a year off.

First of all, wait. Don’t react. Just listen. Odds are the mood will change with the wind and once all her friends are making college plans, that desire that she once had will kick back in. If not, let her know that it won’t be a “free-ride” year. She will be expected to work and save the money she makes for college.

Your college-bound teen refuses to get out of the car on a campus visit

Before you even get out 0f the car your kid announces that he’s just not feeling it. Don’t even attempt to decipher what that means because it’s impossible to understand. You’ve driven (or flown) to go to a college he had on a list and now he’s just not feeling it. Bench your anger, take a deep breath and get out of the car. You’ve come all this way and you’re going to visit the college. In the best of worlds he will get out with you. In the worst of worlds he’ll stay in the car. There’s not much you can do with an obstinate teenager; it’s best to move on.

Your college-bound teen refuses to get organized

Procrastination—a teenager’s favorite technique for avoidance. If procrastination is their favorite technique, then tomorrow is their favorite word. Parents detest hearing that word from their kids, especially when it comes to the application process. What’s a parent to do? You can leave them to their own devises or you can be smart and find ways to help them stay organized. Beat them at their own game: text and email them reminders. If you’re sneaky, you can even add them to the calendar alerts on their smartphone or laptop. Hey, whatever works.

parenting

Saying Goodbye to Your College-Bound Teen

 

saying goodbyeI know I’m a bit premature, but the time will creep up on you before you know it. While you’re busy preparing for that fateful day, the reality is you will soon be saying goodbye. Use the next few months to plan and prepare. Being prepared and making the summer special will help you cope when you leave college on move-in day, shut the door, and realize your little baby is now considered an adult.

Go with them on dorm shopping trips

It goes without saying that your college-bound teen is going to need dorm furnishings and supplies.There are numerous sites that provide parents and students with dorm essential lists, Check out the resources provided by Bed, Bath and Beyond for a campus checklist. This shopping trip can be fun and exciting for both parents and students—make a day of it!

Make the last few days (and weeks) special

Schedule some “date nights” with your college-bound teen. Do some things they love and make the time special. Schedule some family nights and if possible, a family vacation. These days and weeks will help your student cope with homesickness later during the year, and you cope with empty nest syndrome when they are gone.

Have a goodbye party

Nothing says goodbye like a party. Make it memorable by inviting their friends, splurging on some great barbecue, and even providing a cake. Decorate the space or backyard by creating banners with their new college logo and goodbye banners wishing them well.

Talk about expectations on move-in day

Don’t hang around when you’re not wanted. If your student wants you to help them move-in, help and then leave. Some parents take their student to dinner after move-in and then say goodbye. Don’t embarrass them and let go when it’s time.

Saying goodbye is never easy; but if you prepare in advance for the eventuality and make the most of the time, waving goodbye on move-in day will be easier.

parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Motivating an Unmotivated Student

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motivating an unmotivated studentI’m well acquainted with this necessary parenting technique: I had an unmotivated student. It’s not that he wasn’t capable of achieving academic success; it was just that he didn’t have the motivation or the desire to do his best. He never soared in high school, or in the first semester of college, but he did reach his academic potential, finally.

It was hard having a child who didn’t grasp his full potential, no matter how much I told him he was capable of straight A’s. It just didn’t matter to him. Passing with average grades was good enough for him. Those grades, however, contributed to some difficult life choices and some hard lessons along the way. In the end, there were four factors that finally motivated him academically:

1. Good old-fashioned competition

My son chose the Marines over attending college; partly because of his grades and partly because the regiment and rules of the military appealed to him. My daughter worked hard in high school and attended college on several scholarships. My son watched her work hard and study and attended her college graduation with us. He had always felt she was smarter than him and that’s why she excelled. But the fact that she had that degree and he didn’t, made him think long and hard about what he wanted after his 4-year stint in the Marines.

2. Economic realities

After getting out of the Marines and immediately starting college, he crashed and burned. He wasn’t ready for the rigors of studying again and he failed miserably his first semester. After that he chose to go to work; and that meant he would be taking a minimum wage job until he found something better. That something better never came and he realized that in order to compete in the workforce, he needed that college degree.

3. The desire to prove something (mostly to himself)

Often, the key to motivating teens is to prove to them  it’s possible to achieve a particular goal. He had much to prove: he had to start over at a community college, make good grades so he could transfer to a 4-year college, and stay with it until he finished. This one factor is probably what kept him motivated to graduate; and not just graduate, but graduate with summa cum laude with honors.

4. The promise of a positive outcome

My son knew that a college degree would affect his ability to gain employment in a market when most applicants were college graduates. He also knew that his academic achievements would be a plus on his resume and during job interviews.

The basic point here is that motivating an unmotivated student isn’t an easy task. Unfortunately for my son, I realized too late what would motivate him. The self-motivators, like my daughter, are never a problem. It’s the ones who aren’t motivated no matter what you try. If I had only known these four factors with my son, he might have been accepted at one of the military academies. Hopefully, my lessons learned might help other parents who struggle with unmotivated students.

Read Wendy’s post: Using irony and a proverb as self motivation for your teen

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety.Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

 

mom approved tips, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: 10 Tips to Ease Into College

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Moving from high school to college can be daunting. It’s your first step toward independence and adult responsibility. You transition from someone dictating your every move (parents) to the freedom of making every decision. Don’t expect, however, to ease right into college life without an adjustment period. College life will be much easier if you expect some bumps in the road and some course adjustments along the way.

10 tips to ease into college
Illustration from Zinch’s blog: More Than a Test Score

A recent report on college dropout rates presented some shocking statistics – 46% of those who enter college fail to graduate within six years. What you do your first year of college can impact not only your college years but your future. This makes the beginning weeks and months on campus critical for all new students.

Here are 10 tips to ease into college and help with the transition:

1). Don’t skip orientation.

Orientation helps you become familiar with the campus, its opportunities and on-campus organizations. During orientation you will meet your advisors, plan your schedule and do some group activities with other incoming freshmen. Skipping orientation is like skipping the first day of work. Orientation helps you ease into life on campus.

2). Make a friend.

Your college experience will be enhanced by the friendships you make. The first few months are the easiest time to make new friends. You can start with your roommate, your dorm mates, and your classmates. College is not the place to foster your inner shyness; it’s your opportunity to branch out, meet new people and make new relationships.

3). Get organized.

Since your parents won’t be there reminding you to study for your test, do your homework and go to class, you need to get organized. Keep a calendar, set alarms, make to-do lists, schedule study time, and keep track of all your term paper deadlines. Organization will give you peace of mind and alleviate those last minute panic attacks before a test or term paper due date.

4). Make academics a priority.

Even if you were an excellent high school student, this is college. Academics will be more challenging. Without constant parent nudging, it’s tempting to let the studying slide and skip class. If you begin to struggle or feel overwhelmed, get help. Speak with your professors. Take advantage of on-campus tutoring services. Don’t ignore the problem; act before your grades start a downward spiral.

5). Call home.

Every new college student gets homesick. Make time to call your family. They know you better than anyone else and will remind you that you always have their support. Set aside a time each week to talk with your family. It will curtail the homesickness and ease your parents’ inevitable tendency to worry.

Read more for the next 5 tips

parenting, Uncategorized, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Oh the conversations you should have (before prom)

 

promA play on words from Dr. Seuss’ “Oh the Places You’ll Go”; oh the conversations you should have before prom. Apart from the tears, the photos, the worrying and the knowledge that your little baby is all grown up, prom should be an opportunity for you to offer some straight talk about the BIG 3: Sex, Drugs and Drinking. Why? Because at every prom there are students who cross the line and participate in some risky behavior they think demonstrates adulthood.

Sex

Is dating gone? What about courtship? According to a recent NY Times article and most high school and college students it’s a dinosaur. They have random “hook ups” with people they meet–which can include anything from making out to oral sex to intercourse. Parents need to know and understand this new culture in order to prepare their students for college. As I’ve said before, preparation is much more than academics.

Read my post:  The Hooking Up Culture

Drugs

If you or your child has been in the public school system in the last 30 years you’re familiar with the phrase–just say no. From first grade on, those words have been pounded into the heads of kids giving them an answer to anyone who offers them drugs or any other form of abuse. It’s not the answer sometimes that’s important, as much as the attitude behind the response.

Research shows that kids who have a good relationship with their parents are less likely to pursue a life of abuse. The drug awareness programs give parents some guidelines they say will help. They instruct parents to do several things and lead us to believe that if we follow those rules, our kids are less likely to succumb to peer pressure.

Their suggestions have merit. But the bottom line is that most kids, no matter how strong they appear or how great their relationship is with their parents, are going to find themselves in a situation where just saying “no” is not enough. Just saying “no” will be met with teasing, pressure, and even ridicule. It’s your job as a parent to prepare them for that moment.

Read my post: When Just Say “NO” is not enough

Drinking

Your teens are graduating from high school and heading to college. There are 17 million college students that drink alcohol, and 8.5 million of them are binge drinking. We’ve heard the terms “poor” or “struggling” college student before, but it’s no wonder they are living off of Ramen Noodles when there was a reported $163 billion spent on alcohol in America in 2011. It’s not all fun and games when young people are consuming 2 gallons per person of alcohol. There are negative consequences of this behavior that includes assault, rape, injury and even death.

Take a look at these two info graphics that will underscore the importance of this conversation:

How Much Do College Students Drink

The Truth About College Binge Drinking

These are brutal conversations to have with your teen but it may be the last time you can exert some parental influence before they leave for college in the fall. A good friend of mine, Paul Hemphill, a college admissions counselor, says, “every school is a party school.” A difficult fact to face but a reality. Have the conversations now—and if you’re lucky some of it will sink in.

For more prom tips, read Wendy’s post: Surviving Your Teen’s Prom

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety.                                                                                                                                                                           Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Two Kids; Two Types of Students

 

types of studentsIf you have more than one child, odds are they are different. One may excel academically and the other may struggle. Parenting both types of students is a challenge for parents, especially if there is competition among the two. I know. I had one of each in my home for 18+ years.

When you have both types of kids, they should be parented differently. You can’t expect the student who struggles to bring home A’s on every report card; and you can’t compare them to the A student. Each has their own academic style and learning capabilities. It doesn’t mean, however, that the student who struggles can’t excel; and it doesn’t mean that the A student will never bring home a B or C.

The “A” Student

Living with an “A” student can be challenging. It doesn’t seem like it would be, but it is. Most students who excel academically are hard on themselves. They see grades as a part of their self-worth. If they don’t make the grades, they have failed. Perfectionism among this demographic is common and often causes all kinds of emotional issues. So much is expected of them to achieve excellence. One college graduate described what her life as an “A” student was like:

“I wanted to dance. Throw a football. Watch a movie, or get in a car and see the world instead of vicariously traveling through stacks of assigned books. Occasionally, I tossed my pen aside and went out, but these instances were rare, and I usually felt guilty about my abandoned pile of work reproducing with each passing second. At the time, I didn’t know why I put so much pressure on myself. My parents didn’t push me. My professors tried to tell me to lighten up and go have some fun. I could only respond, “Stop dishing out so much work.” I could only give it my all, or give nothing. Now I understand that I was a classic perfectionist who had yet to discover how to define my inherent worth without my achievements. Because I didn’t know how to define myself without my perfect grades, I was terrified of failing, and “failure” meant anything less than perfection, causing me years of undo stress.”

“A” students often can’t play, relax or see the lighter side of anything. Their focus is on attaining the highest GPA in their class and this, and only this, is what life is all about. This type of student, more than any other, needs to understand that apart from the grades, they are accepted and loved.

The “C” Student

If you have a “C” student in your house, you have probably tried everything to get their grades up. You’ve tried yelling, punishing, grounding and bribing them into making “A”s. You might have compared them to their brother or sister who is an “A” student. But believe it or not, the “C” students are the happiest. They may struggle in school and force you to have many parent/teacher conferences, but many average students become successful in college and in life.

Robert Kiyosaki, author of “Why “A” Students Work for “C” Students”, urges parents to lighten up. Kiyosaki believes that the school system was created to churn out ‘Es’ / Employees… those “A Students” who read well, memorize well and test well… and not the creative thinkers, visionaries and dreamers –entrepreneurs-in-the-making… those “C Students who grow up to be the innovators and creators of new ideas, businesses, applications and products.

The book urges parents not to be obsessed with their kids’ “letter grades” (“good grades” might only mean they or the student themselves were successful in jamming a square peg into a round hole…) and focus, instead, on concepts, ideas, and helping their child find their true genius, their special gift. The path they can pursue with a love and true passion.

It’s easy to label our kids: he’s smart, or she’s beautiful, or he’s an “A” student, or she’s just an average student. Be careful when you do that. Kids need to, first and foremost, enjoy their education experience. They can’t when there is too much pressure to excel or they are compared to others who have “met the grade” so to speak. Take the advice from valedictorian: it’s not the grades that matter, it’s the person you become that’s important.

Read Wendy’s Post: Parenting the Superstar and the Struggler

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Sibling Rivalry

 

sibling rivalrySiblings. The very word conjures up thoughts of rivalry. A house with siblings is a house with sibling rivalry. As with any family, competition among siblings begins at an early age. They compete over just about everything: toys, bedtimes, gifts, food, clothing, and the list goes on and on. It’s only natural that the rivalry would increase during the college prep time. But is the rivalry between the siblings of their doing or are you initiating the rivalry by comparing one child to another?

Consider this scenario from a college counselor:

I once worked with two brothers separated by four years. The older brother got into every school he applied to and turned down some of the top schools in the country. When it came to building the younger sibling’s ambitious but more modest college list, he was visibly upset when his father mentioned his brother’s accomplishments repeatedly. In one meeting, I counted the number of times the elder child was mentioned and eventually had to stop the parents when that count reached fifteen. In another situation, a parent said, in front of the child, we don’t want to pay for private school for this child because the younger daughter has more potential and they would rather save their money for her college education.

So here’s the question: are you comparing your children with each other when it comes to college prep? If you are—SNAP OUT OF IT! No two children are alike—emotionally, academically or socially. Expecting one to be like the other is fueling the flames of rivalry. If you are doing this, possibly unknowingly, how can you stop?

Be positive about their individuality

This is a major step in your child’s life, even if you’ve been through it before with the other siblings. Even though you will learn from experiences, it’s important to know that those experiences do not dictate the process with your other children. Focus on the individual process and treat each sibling as you did the first, making them feel special. Listen to them tell you what they want, where they want to go, and how they want to get there. Use experience but make it.

Praise success and celebrate acceptances

Don’t look back; look forward. Even if one sibling may not excel academically in comparison to another, praise all their individual successes. When the decisions arrive, be supportive and excited about all of them, even if some of the colleges don’t necessarily appeal to you. Being accepted to college is a major accomplishment, even if another sibling may have been accepted to colleges with more prestige. Recognize that every child has a specific path in life and each of them can be successful in the path they choose.

Don’t highlight differences, especially in front of others

As we saw in the story above, highlighting another child’s accomplishments or successes in front of others is hurtful to you child. He needs to feel that he is special and unique.

Case in point: my brother experienced this comparison all throughout school. He was two years behind me and struggled academically. I, conversely, was the model student. Teachers especially pointed out that fact to him. My parents, unknowingly, communicated that to him. Because of this, he failed at his first attempt at college. Later in life, after recognizing his strengths, he went on to receive his Ph.D. It was in the comparison that he felt failure.

It’s hard for teenagers to be constantly compared to others, especially when the competition lives in the same house. It’s your role as their parents to guide them to find their own individual talents and pursue their own path in life.

 Ready Wendy’s post: College-bound sibling rivalry is more than jealousy

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

mom approved tips, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: How to Help Without Harming

 

helping without harmingAs graduation approaches parents of college-bound teens will be transitioning to different phases in their teen’s lives. Being the parents that we are, we will want to help. And our helping is not always good. Sometimes we “help” and it ends up harming their ability to think, act, and decide for themselves. It’s easy to justify our actions but when it’s all said and done we want to raise competent, independent and decisive children.

Saying all of that, how do you help without harming?

Teach them to self-advocate

One of the greatest tools a young adult can have is the ability to self-advocate. For years you have been fighting their battles for them. When they reach high school and move on to college, it’s time for them to learn how to do it for themselves. It may be hard to stand by silently and watch your teen get hurt or struggle with relationships (both with other teens and adults); but if you don’t step back, your college-bound teen will never be able to stand on their own two feet.

Listen

Listening is the hardest thing for a parent to do. We want to fix things because that’s what parents do. But sometimes things don’t need to be fixed. Sometimes our kids need to learn that life will bring conflict, disappointment and discouragement. They will learn this if you don’t jump in and fix every problem instantly. In college they will need to fix their own problems. Start letting them do this in high school.

Recognize their independence

Start early in high school and increase their freedom just a little at a time. As they exhibit responsibility and trustworthiness, allow them more freedom. By the time they leave for college they should be able to make decisions based on what is best for them simply because you allowed them to do it high school and fail at times.

Let go

You know the old adage, “If you love someone, set them free.” Parents never want to set their children free. We say we do. We try to do it. But deep down, when that little baby turns into a young adult it becomes harder and harder to let go. Parents who don’t let go have to deal with the repercussions later. This holding on has produced a generation of boomerang children—children who return home after college because they can’t succeed as independent adults.

For those parents who are waving goodbye to their teens in the fall, you’ve got three months to give them a crash course in independence. If you’re parenting an incoming high school freshman your job should be easy—you’ve got four years to get it done right!

mom approved tips, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: Graduation Anxiety

 

graduationMay means graduation. You may be thinking about gifts for graduates. But there is so much more to think about. Your student will be graduating—but you are too. You’re graduating from years of college prep. For most parents it starts early—thinking and planning for their college education. When they are born, you think you have all the time in the world. This month, that time has flown by and you can’t believe they will be leaving soon for college. And the anxiety over losing your baby begins.

Have you done enough to prepare them for adulthood?

We all ask that question. And even when they are grown, it’s going to whirl through our minds from time to time. Parenthood has its challenges and throughout the 18 years or more that they are with us, we’re bound to struggle and wonder if we did everything we could do to teach them independence, consequences, and moral values. You may not feel like you did, but kids are like sponges. They soak up everything they see. They hear everything they say. And they will use it when you least expect it.

What will you do with yourself?

After years of shuffling them to school, sports, working on homework, and most recently spending every waking moment on college prep, what will you do with all this free time? If this is your only child, you’re going to feel lost. If it’s not, the other kids will absorb your time—don’t ask me how but it happens. If this is your last one and you’re facing an empty nest, be prepared to grieve. It’s going to happen; embrace it. Then, as with all grief, it will pass and it’s time for you to readjust your priorities. It’s time to ask yourself this question: What do “I” want? For 18 years or more it’s been all about them; now it’s time for it to be all about you!

How will they survive without you?

How will they remember to do their homework, wash their hands, clean their rooms, and get up in time for class? What will they eat and when will they eat? Will they get enough rest and concentrate on their health? Will they make friends easily? Will they succumb to peer pressure?

You’ve been their lifejacket for the last 18 years. It’s time for them to swim, and possibly sink, on their own. Trust that you have taught them well and if they do start to struggle or fail, they will work it out as all adults must do. It’s scary standing on the sidelines but it’s time to remind yourself that they will be fine without you.

Isn’t that our goal from the day they are born? We just didn’t think it would come so soon. Wipe the tears, celebrate their achievement, and look ahead to the future. It’s going to be an exciting era—for both you and your kids.

parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Mother’s Day, Smother Day

 

mother's daySunday is Mother’s Day and it’s time for those of us who have sacrificed, loved, cared for and smothered our kids to be honored. Yes. I said smothered. Some mothers have mastered this technique so well that their kids don’t have a clue how to deal with failure, disappointment, and pain.

Do you relate to this type of mother? My daughter does. She says it’s going to be her—right down to making sure her kids are the center of her universe and vice versa. We laugh about it, but her boys might not think it’s so funny.

So in an effort to help all those teens (and mothers) from celebrating another smother day, I’ve compiled my list of tell-tale smothering signs.

You might be a smotherer if . . .

  • You incessantly text your teen during school to ask about __________ (you fill in the blank).
  • You go on the college visit with them and ask questions about campus security on the walking tour.
  • You send ________ (fill in the blank) to admissions officers to butter them up; and call to ask if they received them.
  • You show up at school unannounced with __________________ (fill in the blank), embarrassing them in front of their peers.
  • You call the coach because your teen didn’t make the team.
  • You spend the night in his dorm room for the first week of school.
  • You move close to campus so that you can be available.
  • You drive hundreds of miles to college to deliver _________________ (fill in the blank) because she called and said she “had to have it”.
  • You fill out their college application for them (because they can’t possibly do it on their own).
  • You call the mother of the son who broke up with your daughter to ask why he did it.

Are these extreme? For some, yes. But all of these are true stories, based on talking with parents and admissions counselors. Is it hard to believe? Probably not in today’s world of over parenting. If you see yourself in any of these scenarios it might be time to join our support group of smotherers: Hi, my name is Suzanne, and I’m a smotherer!

Happy Mother’s (Smother) Day!

Read Wendy’s post: Embracing your almost adult children on Mother’s Day

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Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.