All posts by Suzanne Shaffer

college guidance, college planning, scholarships

Memorial Day

May 26, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

Memorial Day

When my father was alive, one of my favorite activities was to go through his pictures of World War II. He served in the Army Air Corp in India. His unit helped build the Burma Road. He had stories to tell of being on narrow roads, being ambushed, swimming with sharks in the Indian Ocean, and having monkeys for pets. It all seemed so long ago in a time that I could only imagine.

When my son graduated from high school, he joined the United States Marine Corps. As any mother, I worried and fretted over his safety, even though it wasn’t during war time. He would come home and tell me stories of venturing across the arctic circle with the Norwegian military, being part of the task force in Panama when we relinquished control fo the canal, and hiking up Mt. Fuji with Japanese soldiers.

In honor of Memorial Day, following are a few posts that I’ve written with this theme in mind:

The military academies and ROTC in college

Scholarships for military dependents

5 Things military parents should know about college

As you celebrate Memorial Day, remember the sacrifice that so many have made to protect our freedom. And enjoy the holiday with your family and friends.

Scholarship Friday, scholarships

Scholarship Friday: Scholarships with June Deadlines

May 23, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

It’s Friday and with a long weekend ahead, I’m sure your college-bound teen would like to do nothing better than apply for scholarships. Yes, I’m being sarcastic. But seriously, summer is quickly approaching and it’s the best time to research and apply for scholarships. Looking for some scholarships with June deadlines? Read on . . .

Why should your teen apply for scholarships?

This seems like a no-brainer to me, but many parents brush it off as a waste of time because of the number of applicants and their student’s chances of winning. It’s just like any other “winning” strategy–the more you apply, the more your chances of winning increase. Also, if you’re wise and apply to the right scholarships (locally, for instance) your chances of winning increase.

Where do they begin?

You can start on my blog. Read my series of scholarships posts to find out how to search, what tools to use, scholarships that are available, and even scholarship apps that can help.

What is the best use of their time?

Apply to the easy ones first. Zinch has a weekly 3-sentence scholarship that requires you answer a question with three sentences to win a $1000 scholarship. For a list of easy scholarships you can start with, read my post: 10 Easy Scholarships.

What can they do to jumpstart the search?

Recently, I wrote a series of posts for TeenLife.com regarding scholarships with June deadlines. This is a great place to jump right in and start applying to the ones with upcoming deadlines. Once they do that, register on some scholarship search sites to get email notifications when a scholarship becomes available that matches their search criteria.

Following are the links to the two posts for TeenLife.com:

Scholarships with June Deadlines: Part 1

Scholarships with June Deadlines: Part 2

Remember: they can’t win FREE money if they don’t put the effort into the search and follow through with the applications. It’s your job as a parents college coach to guide them and help when needed. Once those scholarship dollars start rolling in it will be worth all the time and effort. Happy Hunting!

social networks, Uncategorized

25 School Counselors to Follow on Twitter

May 22, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

School counselors often get a bad rap when it comes to college prep. But here are 25 school counselors to follow on Twitter who are committed to students and helping parents.

@AllCollegePlan http://www.twitter.com/allcollegeplan
@jacketcounselor http://www.twitter.com/jacketcounselor
@bmhscounselors http://www.twitter.com/bmhscounselors
@rosEcounselor http://www.twitter.com/rosecounselor
@PHSCouns http://www.twitter.com/phscouns
@MrsBoisvertLHS https://twitter.com/MrsBoisvertLHS
@wohlcounselor http://www.twitter.com/wohlcounselor
@EagleGuidance http://www.twitter.com/eagleguidance
@ecmmason http://www.twitter.com/ecmmason
@MrLinhartTweets http://www.twitter.com/mrlinharttweets
@LovelyLysa http://www.twitter.com/lovelylysa
@juliavtaylor http://www.twitter.com/juliavtaylor
@MrJGoldman http://www.twitter.com/mrjgoldman
@mkelley723 http://www.twitter.com/mkelley723
@foustytouton http://www.twitter.com/foustytouton
@CounselingGeek http://www.twitter.com/counselinggeek
@vernondavemack http://www.twitter.com/vernondavemack
@mertensminute http://www.twitter.com/mertensminute
@conniemward http://www.twitter.com/conniemward
@CounselorBDavis http://www.twitter.com/counselorbdavis
@SSpellmanCann http://www.twitter.com/sspellmancann
@rawolfson http://www.twitter.com/rawolfson
@PhilEchols http://www.twitter.com/philechols
@Missy_VanAnda http://www.twitter.com/missy_vananda
@eschcounselor http://www.twitter.com/eschcounselor

. . . and follow @SCCrowd (http://www.twitter.com/sccrowd) and attend the #SCCrowd Twitter chat at 8PM ET on the 3rd Tuesday of every month to ask any question you might have for a counselor.

Here are 3 ways #SCCrowd works:

Post a question anytime of day or night to #sccrowd especially on the day of the chat
Answer others questions anytime if you can
Join the chat the third Tuesday of the month

parenting, Wednesdays parent

Wednesday’s Parent: Sibling Rivalry

May 21, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

Siblings. The very word conjures up thoughts of rivalry. A house with siblings is a house with sibling rivalry. As with any family, competition among siblings begins at an early age. They compete over just about everything: toys, bedtimes, gifts, food, clothing, and the list goes on and on. It’s only natural that the rivalry would increase during the college prep time. But is the rivalry between the siblings of their doing or are you initiating the rivalry by comparing one child to another?

Consider this scenario from a college counselor:

I once worked with two brothers separated by four years. The older brother got into every school he applied to and turned down some of the top schools in the country. When it came to building the younger sibling’s ambitious but more modest college list, he was visibly upset when his father mentioned his brother’s accomplishments repeatedly. In one meeting, I counted the number of times the elder child was mentioned and eventually had to stop the parents when that count reached fifteen. In another situation, a parent said, in front of the child, we don’t want to pay for private school for this child because the younger daughter has more potential and they would rather save their money for her college education.

So here’s the question: are you comparing your children with each other when it comes to college prep? If you are—SNAP OUT OF IT! No two children are alike—emotionally, academically or socially. Expecting one to be like the other is fueling the flames of rivalry. If you are doing this, possibly unknowingly, how can you stop?

Be positive about their individuality

This is a major step in your child’s life, even if you’ve been through it before with the other siblings. Even though you will learn from experiences, it’s important to know that those experiences do not dictate the process with your other children. Focus on the individual process and treat each sibling as you did the first, making them feel special. Listen to them tell you what they want, where they want to go, and how they want to get there. Use experience but make it.

Praise success and celebrate acceptances

Don’t look back; look forward. Even if one sibling may not excel academically in comparison to another, praise all their individual successes. When the decisions arrive, be supportive and excited about all of them, even if some of the colleges don’t necessarily appeal to you. Being accepted to college is a major accomplishment, even if another sibling may have been accepted to colleges with more prestige. Recognize that every child has a specific path in life and each of them can be successful in the path they choose.

Don’t highlight differences, especially in front of others

As we saw in the story above, highlighting another child’s accomplishments or successes in front of others is hurtful to you child. He needs to feel that he is special and unique.

Case in point: my brother experienced this comparison all throughout school. He was two years behind me and struggled academically. I, conversely, was the model student. Teachers especially pointed out that fact to him. My parents, unknowingly, communicated that to him. Because of this, he failed at his first attempt at college. Later in life, after recognizing his strengths, he went on to receive his Ph.D. It was in the comparison that he felt failure.

It’s hard for teenagers to be constantly compared to others, especially when the competition lives in the same house. It’s your role as their parents to guide them to find their own individual talents and pursue their own path in life.

Ready Wendy’s post: College-bound sibling rivalry is more than jealousy

____________________

Wednesday’s child may be full of woe but Wednesday’s Parent can substitute action for anxiety. Each Wednesday Wendy and I will provide parent tips to get and keep your student on the college track. It’s never too late or too early to start!

The bonus is on the fourth Wednesday of each month when Wendy and I will host Twitter chat #CampusChat at 9pm ET/6pm PT. We will feature an expert on a topic of interest for parents of the college-bound.

Wednesday’s Parent will give twice the info and double the blog posts on critical parenting issues by clicking on the link at the end of the article from parentingforcollege to pocsmom.com and vice versa.

App Tuesday, college apps, Uncategorized

App Tuesday: 7 College Savings Apps

May 20, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

Saving for college is difficult, especially in today’s world. Add the rising college costs to the mix and your family finds it hard to save enough money to pay for college. It can be done, but it requires a commitment and the tools to make it happen.

First, there’s the question of “How much do you need to save for college?” SavingforCollege.com provides an informative infographic walking your through the planning stage step-by-step. It might be shocking for some parents, but knowing what you need can help you plan.

Following are 7 college savings apps that can help you plan for the future:

1. College Save

If you have a smartphone or tablet, you now have a unique way to reach and teach your kids about the basics of saving for college. Small Steps, Big Dreams is a series of fun, interactive games and financial lessons designed to engage your kids and inspire them to be money-smart. The Small Steps, Big Dreams program is made up of three mobile applications for specific age rangers and is designed to make the overwhelming concept of saving for higher education manageable.

2. UPromise

Over a decade ago, Upromise was launched based on the philosophy that everyone should be able to afford a college education. Today, with millions of members, Upromise is helping make that a reality for many Americans. Memberscreate a college savings service that harnesses the purchasing power of parents, extended family, family, and students to make it easier to pay for college. They direct their spending to Upromise partners—including more than 950 online stores, 10,000+ restaurants, grocery and drugstore items—and earn money for college. Thus far, members have earned $850,000,000 and counting for college with their everyday spending

3. College Savings App

With the TIAA-CREF College Savings Planner, you can keep track of your college savings goals wherever you are. Use the College Savings Planner to model your college funding goals and how you plan to help meet them. With the College Savings Planner you can explore: where you are now with college savings; your projected college savings; how much college could cost in your timeframe; what you’ll probably need to invest to meet college costs; and setting a realistic, achievable action plan

4. collegeFund

Planning college savings is not an easy job. Many factors come into play: such as the cost of college education (tuition, room and board, other mandatory fees, books and computers), the award of scholarships, the financial aid, and so on. CollegeFund app is trying to help the parents (sometimes grandparents, and/or other family members if they are willing to chip in) to plan their kids’ college savings account. Given a set of input: current annual college cost, current savings, how much you plan to save annually, your kid’s current age, the age starting college, the age of graduating, the calculator will return how much the annual income you can expect from the college saving account vs. the future annual college cost (Coverage Ratio), and how much you have saved toward achieving the goal (Saving progress).

5. CollegeSavings

College Savings is an innovative App, which visually shows the projected cost of college in the future. College Savings illustrated the future value of savings using the current lump sum and monthly savings plan. College Savings shows the potential shortfall amount needed to cover the total cost of college. In addition it also illustrates any surplus amount remaining after covering the future cost of college. By adjusting the input, you can estimate the amount of lump sum and regular monthly savings that is required to cover the costs of your desired college.

6. College Saving Wiz

The COLLEGE SAVING WIZ app will help you with SETTING GOALS for college attendance; CALCULATING the estimated costs with inflation; CALCULATING monthly/yearly savings needs; and TIPS on ways to save and cut costs! Don’t worry if you don’t know the actual tuition costs or even the college your child may attend. Our app provides convenient average costs for you to use based on the College Board annual survey of college pricing for tuition/fees, room/board, books/supplies, transportation and expenses for Public in-state, Public out-of-state and Private Colleges. You just input some basic information and COLLEGE SAVING WIZ will calculate the goal amount you must save each period, adjusting for inflation.

7. Saving4College

With the TIAA-CREF Saving4College Savings Planner, you can keep track of your college savings goals wherever you are. Use the Saving4College Savings Planner to model your college funding goals and how you plan to help meet them.With the Saving4College Savings Planner you can explore: where you are now with college savings; your projected college ; how much college could cost in your timeframe; what you’ll probably need to invest to meet college costs; and setting a realistic, achievable action plan.

mom approved tips, parenting

Mom-Approved Tips: How to Help Without Harming

May 19, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

As graduation approaches parents of college-bound teens will be transitioning to different phases in their teen’s lives. Being the parents that we are, we will want to help. And our helping is not always good. Sometimes we “help” and it ends up harming their ability to think, act, and decide for themselves. It’s easy to justify our actions but when it’s all said and done we want to raise competent, independent and decisive children.

Saying all of that, how do you help without harming?

Teach them to self-advocate

One of the greatest tools a young adult can have is the ability to self-advocate. For years you have been fighting their battles for them. When they reach high school and move on to college, it’s time for them to learn how to do it for themselves. It may be hard to stand by silently and watch your teen get hurt or struggle with relationships (both with other teens and adults); but if you don’t step back, your college-bound teen will never be able to stand on their own two feet.

Listen

Listening is the hardest thing for a parent to do. We want to fix things because that’s what parents do. But sometimes things don’t need to be fixed. Sometimes our kids need to learn that life will bring conflict, disappointment and discouragement. They will learn this if you don’t jump in and fix every problem instantly. In college they will need to fix their own problems. Start letting them do this in high school.

Recognize their independence

Start early in high school and increase their freedom just a little at a time. As they exhibit responsibility and trustworthiness, allow them more freedom. By the time they leave for college they should be able to make decisions based on what is best for them simply because you allowed them to do it high school and fail at times.

Let go

You know the old adage, “If you love someone, set them free.” Parents never want to set their children free. We say we do. We try to do it. But deep down, when that little baby turns into a young adult it becomes harder and harder to let go. Parents who don’t let go have to deal with the repercussions later. This holding on has produced a generation of boomerang children—children who return home after college because they can’t succeed as independent adults.

For those parents who are waving goodbye to their teens in the fall, you’ve got three months to give them a crash course in independence. If you’re parenting an incoming high school freshman your job should be easy—you’ve got four years to get it done right!

book reviews

Carpe College! A Review and a Giveaway

May 17, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer 5 Comments

It is graduation time and every parent and relative are looking for gifts for graduates. I know, I know. No teenager likes to receive a book for graduation. But, if you’re smart, you can stuff it in a backpack, add it to a duffle bag or stick it in a laptop case or messenger bag. However you choose to gift it, you MUST get them a copy of this book: Carpe College!

It’s not just a gift, it’s an investment in the graduate’s future. And when I say that, I mean this is the BEST book for soon-to-be college students. They may not read it right away, but I guarantee there will be some point in the first few months of college that they will pick it up. Because this book is more than just a book—it’s a guidebook to making the most of a college education. It’s a book written for college students in a language they can understand.

I don’t write in-depth reviews because most of us have little time to read those. What I do like to do is tell you what I liked about the book and what stood out to me. That way, you can easily see its value over other graduation gift books. I mean, “Oh the Places You’ll Go” is great but it’s going to sit on a shelf after they read it once. This book won’t. They will use it as a reference book over the next four years when they feel like they are spinning their wheels, or are frustrated with the major they have chosen, or they can’t seem to fit in, or they have a horrific roommate that is driving them crazy. That’s right, this book covers these topics and so much more!

What I like about Carpe College!

Here it is. A simple list of why I like this book so much:

It’s easy to read. So many books go on for page after page discussing one topic.
It’s broken up into sections, which makes it easier to find what you are looking for.
It’s filled with quotes for inspiration. Who doesn’t like quotes?
The section and chapter headings cracked me up: Swinging from the Trapeze at the Country Club, Tempus Fugit (More Latin! You’re Killing Me, Smalls!), The Famous Formula (aka Smells Like Teen Freedom to name a few.
It addresses every aspect of college life in a way that students can relate to.
The illustrations are cute. Who doesn’t like illustrations?
There’s an appendix filled with charts, and planners, and advice from students who have “been there and done that.”
The information in it is relevant to today’s college student.

All kidding aside . . . if you just get one book for your graduate, I would recommend this book. And before you pass it along (or after) read it yourself. Or better yet, get your own copy!

Giveaway

If you like what you read and think you might like a copy for your graduate (or another graduate you know) I’ve got good news for you. I’m giving a copy away here on my blog. That’s right—FREE. Your very own copy of Carpe College! by Mike Metzler: a great book by an even greater parent.

All you have to do is follow the directions in the giveaway below. Enter as many times as you want every day. Pass the URL along to your family and friends. And it the end of the giveaway we will draw a winner!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Scholarship Friday, scholarships

Scholarship Friday: CEO Sam Yagan Talks about the MatchMade Scholarship

May 16, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

Last week, I posted a blog about the scholarship offering from Match.com: the MatchMade $50,000 Scholarship. This week, I had the opportunity to interview Sam Yagan, the CEO of Match.com. I asked Sam some questions about the scholarship, who is eligible, and how the students can participate. He breaks it down simply in the interview and if you’re one of those parents who met on Match.com, you will want to listen to it. If you’re not and you know a parent who is, pass this along.

I asked him the following questions:

1. Why offer a scholarship for “match made” kids? What prompted you to do this?

2. Can you give us a little information about the scholarship contest?

3. Why did you choose videos instead of essays or other criteria such as GPA, extracurriculars?

4. How can parents help their kids with the videos?

5. How will you be judging the videos?

Social media is going to be an integral part of winning the scholarship so it’s not too early to start talking, chatting, and posting about your student’s entry. Don’t forget–the deadline to submit the video is June 30th. Get started today!

Kids can submit their videos through MatchMade.com.

This is a sponsored post for Match.com

college health

Sleep Disorders–The Transition to College

May 15, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer

Preparing your child for college demands a lot from a parent – there’s so much to think about and always a concern that your child may not cope well with a new environment. If that child happens to have a sleep disorder of some kind, parents can become even more anxious worrying that they will not settle well and that their disorder may be exacerbated as a result. Here are a few tips to help you prepare your child to adjust to college life, and learn to cope with their sleeping disorder without mom or pop.

Some types of sleep disorders

Quality sleep is needed for good health and it can affect mood, hormone levels and weight. Sleep problems therefore impact on the same areas as well as causing tiredness and poor concentration. Common disorders include sleep apnea, sleep deprivation, insomnia, restless legs syndrome and snoring.

Children and adolescents require a minimum of nine hours of sleep per night. This means that sleep problems and a lack of sleep can have negative effects on your child’s performance at college, including during extracurricular activities and on their social relationships. While snoring does not seem like a serious problem, except perhaps for a sleep partner, habitual snoring does in fact have an adverse effect on the quality of sleep of the person who snores. Nightmares, night terrors and sleepwalking are among many disruptive disorders known as parasomnias. When sleep apnea is a problem, the child’s breathing becomes disrupted regularly during sleep and they may experience restless nights, fatigue during the day and poor concentration, which of course makes it difficult for them to study effectively.

Continue reading Sleep Disorders–The Transition to College →

Guest Posts, study abroad

Consider Studying or Volunteering Abroad This Summer

May 15, 2014 Suzanne Shaffer 1 Comment

For many teens, it can be tempting to spend summers off from school hanging out with friends, sleeping in well past noon, and doing a whole lot of, well, nothing. And while it’s true that some downtime for your growing kids is absolutely necessary – two and a half months of doing nothing but lounging around is maybe not the healthiest option.

Encouraging your teens to get out and have some worthy, productive summer experiences is super important – for you, and for them. This is especially true if your teen is hoping to go to college, and possibly even win a scholarship or two. After all, what’s going to look better to a college admissions board – months of sitting around at home, or a worthwhile volunteer abroad program?

There are many different summer activities out there for high school students, but one of the best, and most beneficial, is the option of studying or volunteering abroad. High school study abroad has been on the rise for a few years now, and there are many reasons why:

1) Foreign language proficiency is an incredibly important skill to have in today’s world. And because younger students learn faster than college-aged students, your teen is more than likely going to be able to soak up another language pretty fast – giving him or her one awesomely marketable skill for the future.

2) Study abroad looks wonderful on college applications and resumes. Because it’s possible to earn college credit or community service hours while abroad, your child’s abroad experience will signal to college admissions counselors that he or she takes academics seriously. In addition, study abroad really helps imbue students with vital global leadership skills and a more balanced, worldly perspective – talk about a great resume-booster!

3) While abroad, your teen will receive a much richer education than a normal classroom would provide. Study abroad programs offer a chance to learn about a country’s language, history, and culture – while living in that country! This kind of in-depth, culturally-enriching education will be invaluable to your teen.

4) Gain good contacts and networking prospects for the future. You never know who you’ll meet when you seize an opportunity like the chance to study or volunteer abroad. Other than gaining good skills for a future job (it’s not that far off!), it’s entirely probable that your child could make some worthy connections for the future – and possibly even score a potential summer internship or employment opportunity.

5) Studying abroad is an amazing experience. Your teen will undoubtedly achieve new levels of maturity, focus, and tolerance while abroad – being immersed in a foreign culture just has a way of doing that to you. And, of course, study abroad is a wonderfully fun experience!

Just as an added bonus: high school study abroad doesn’t have to be expensive! Many programs offer scholarships, financial aid, or fundraising guides. So, start encouraging your teen to get out in the world and have a life-changing abroad experience!

Parenting for College

All posts by Suzanne Shaffer

Memorial Day

Scholarship Friday: Scholarships with June Deadlines