Tag Archives: parenting

college guidance, college planning, parenting

My Top 10 Posts–Helping Parents Parent

 

After reading Chris’ guest blog post on Character (The #1 Key to Success in College), I felt it might be prudent to bring back my “best of the best” posts specifically directed toward helping parents parent their college-bound teens. Feel free to pass the link along to other parents (pretty please????).

1. Is college just about ROI?
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/11/is-college-just-about-roi/

2. 10 concepts your teen should learn BEFORE college
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/04/10-concepts/

3. Top 10 things every parents should know about “hooking up” in college
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/04/hooking-up-in-college/

4. Motivating an under-achiever toward college
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/12/motivating-an-underachiever-toward-college/

5. Top 10 Do’s and Don’ts of parenting a college-bound teen
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/05/parenting-college-bound-teens/

6. Top 10 Questions parents ask about college
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/06/top-10-questions-parents-ask-about-college/

7. Being realistic about college debt
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/06/being-realistic-about-college-debt/

8. Being a parent college coach: the three C’s
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/05/being-a-parent-college-coach-the-3-cs/

9. Preparing your teen for college
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2009/05/preparing-your-teen-for-college-its-all-about-guiding-not-doing/

10. Six Campus Safety talking points
http://www.parentingforcollege.com/2010/05/campus-safety/

college planning, parenting

The Number One Key To Success In College

What is the primary key for your kids to succeed in college?

grades – avoiding procrastination – passion – friends-scholarships – study time – lots of beer (just kidding…although some kids think that)

Here it is parents!  Get out your journal, grab a pen…you don’t want to miss this one!

CHARACTER

M-W.com definition of character: moral excellence and firmness <a man of sound character>

Chris Spradlin’s definition of character: “Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.”…Jackson Browne actually said this!

As parents we can teach our kids to make great grades, to be on time, we can instill passion deep into their souls, encourage them to make great friends and study.  But the single greatest asset that we can deposit deep into our kids heart is Character.

As our kids enter college we must encourage them to exhibit character in the following areas…

  • Study Ethics: I remember that my toughest subject my freshman in College was Algebra.  To be honest, I am just not that bright when it comes to math.  How did I make it through?  I cheated my entire way through the class.  I never built a math foundation for my remaining years; therefore I struggled through all four years of College.  Parents, we must teach our kids to walk in character when it comes to study ethics.  We must teach them to work hard, study hard, ask questions, join study groups; but at the end of the day, we must teach our kids that it is much better to take a low grade than to cheat.
  • Honoring The Gift: Many students today expect that they will attend college.  I believe that is a good expectation but that parents should help them understand that attending college is a gift!  In the world we live in today many students can’t afford college, don’t have the grades to get into college or don’t have their families help to make it into college.  I believe that parents should teach their kids to walk through the college doors with thankfulness and humility!  That each time they enter a class or extracurricular activity that they should recognize that attending college is a gift other kids don’t have and to honor it.
  • Contributing Financially: I know that this can be a controversial subject for some, but I strongly believe that by asking a student to contribute financially in some form or fashion…this creates ownership in the college experience.
  • Free Time: One of the biggest lessons that I have learned in my life is when a mentor of mine sat me down, looked me in the eyes and said, “Chris, I want you to know that life is not all about you”!  The reality is that most kids enter college and they are the star of their own show, life is about them…their grades, their friends, their fraternity and their social life.  I believe that parents should teach their kids that, “life is not all about them”.  Parents should teach their kids to use their free time to serve others.  Encourage them to serve in a soup kitchen, serve in a local religious organization, mentor a struggling student or befriend someone who is having a tough time with the college transition.

I believe the number one key to success in college is character. Parents, we must take the time to live this out and deposit character deep into the heart, soul and mind of our kids and then they will be truly successful.

******

This guest post was contribured by Chris Spradlin, the founder of www.epicparent.tv.  According to Chris: “I didn’t launch epicparent to showcase my parenting skills, but rather be honest about my failures, wounds, wins and my journey as a parent.  I absolutely love honest, authentic, on-the-edge, innovative, entrepreneurial, get-your-hands-dirty parenting. I believe that if parents would step into their God-given role, the world would be changed!”

admissions, college guidance, college planning, parenting

Is college just about ROI?

This week on #CampusChat there was a guest that informed us that college is a bad investment for a large percentage of teens. Granted, I could see her point (You can read the transcript here). Many teens aren’t ready for college. I agree it is important to counsel our teens on finding out what they love and guiding them along a career path. But is college truly all about ROI? Do we encourage our kids to go to college solely based on the fact that they will give us a good return on our investment?

It’s not that I don’t agree that college, for some, is a bad decision (Should everyone go to college?). Not because it’s a bad investment, but because they aren’t suited for it and would be happier pursuing other options. Should you go into massive debt for a liberal arts degree that leaves you unemployable? Absolutely not (Being realistic about college debt). But, could you get a liberal arts degree and in the process discover your passion? Absolutely.

If you ask both of my children if they thought college was about ROI, they would have different answers. My daughter would say that college for her was so much more than getting that degree and finding a job. She would say that it gave her life experiences. She would say that she found lifelong friends in college. She would say that her study abroad experience was invaluable. She would tell you that she learned about the business world doing internships related to her major. It was at college that she learned independence, budgeting, developed a strong work ethic, got an education, and basically grew up. And she would say that you can’t put a dollar amount on those four years.

My son, on the other hand, had a very different experience. He was not a good student in high school and didn’t show much interest in college, opting for a 4-year term of service in the Marines. After the Marines, he decided to go to college. For him, it was more about pushing himself to attain the degree and proving to himself that he was capable of that level of education. He attended community college for two years and transferred to a 4-year college to finish his degree among the top graduates in his major. And while he did incur some debt acquiring that degree, he would never say it was a waste of time and money or a poor return on investment even though he’s not working in a career related to his liberal arts major.

I’ve known smart kids who knew their career paths at an early age and got to college and failed. I’ve known average students without a clue of what they wanted to be, attend college, find their passion and excel. College opens up your mind, introduces you to experiences and submerges you in academia. Should you be wise about which college you choose and how much you pay for that education and life experience? Of course you should!

I admit. I’m a proponent of college. Perhaps it’s because I never had the opportunity to go. Perhaps it’s because my parents never encouraged me to go. Perhaps it’s because both my kids found value in two different educational paths. For me it’s so much more than ROI. Maybe I’m burying my head in the sand. But I still believe that a college education is something that has great value beyond its cost.

And that, my loyal readers, is one parent’s opinion!

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Should everyone go to college?

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I read an article recently in The Atlantic: “In the Basement of the Ivory Tower“, that gave me some food for thought. It’s been on my mind for quite awhile, especially since I have a close friend who is a financial aid counselor at one of those infamous “for profit” colleges.

She would answer my leading question with a loud and emphatic, “NO”, based on her experience dealing with those who are not prepared to attend college and don’t understand the consequences of borrowing money that they can’t pay back. They have been convinced that without a college education, they can’t get a job or pursue a career. They’ve been told by someone that it doesn’t matter how much money you borrow as long as you get that degree. Once you get that degree you can earn enough money to pay back what you’ve borrowed. But we all know that’s not often the case.

In the above mentioned article, the English professor makes an interesting point:

America, ever-idealistic, seems wary of the vocational-education track. We are not comfortable limiting anyone’s options. Telling someone that college is not for him seems harsh and classist and British, as though we were sentencing him to a life in the coal mines. I sympathize with this stance; I subscribe to the American ideal.

Sending everyone under the sun to college is a noble initiative. Academia is all for it, naturally. Industry is all for it; some companies even help with tuition costs. Government is all for it; the truly needy have lots of opportunities for financial aid. The media applauds it—try to imagine someone speaking out against the idea. To oppose such a scheme of inclusion would be positively churlish.

I’ve come to realize that Americans truly are snobs. We brag about what we have and what we have obtained. Like it or not, we are a classist society. We snub our noses at those who haven’t been to college and brag heavily about our numerous degrees as if they are badges of honor. And while graduating from college is an accomplishment, so is learning a trade.

Often, we push our kids to attend college when we know it’s not for them. Why? Because we are a society that measures success by the number of degrees hanging on a wall or the dollar signs that can be found on our bank accounts. It is noble to dream big and education is always a noble goal. But so is being a plumber, a carpenter, a cosmetologist or a civil servant like a police officer or fireman.

What’s my point? My point is that you need to know your child. If they want to go to college and have the skills and knowledge they need to be successful there, then encourage them to go. But if they aren’t interested or motivated, save yourself some heartache, disappointment and money by letting them pursue a trade. There are so many fabulous careers out there that they can do without higher education. You will be happier, they will be happier and they will fill an important role in society. College really isn’t for everyone.

admissions, college guidance, college planning, parenting, Uncategorized

A CollegeParent Partnership

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With all the recent talk of helicopter parents, I’ve picked up on some slight disdain from academia when it comes to parent involvement. Granted, there are some parents that would make any admissions representative pull their hair out. But I would like to think that there are so many more parents who view their role more as a coach in the process and would like to have colleges value their input. After all, when it comes right down to it, parents are generally the ones paying the bill for the student’s education.

During a recent #CampusChat on Twitter, Gil Rogers, Associate Director of Admissions and Enrollment Technology for the University of New Haven shed some light on how his college views the parent/college relationship:

We like to be a partner in a family’s college search, not just an option. We simply encourage parents to allow students to have their space and make the choice. Let the kid drive the car. We have, however, developed a number of communication tools with parents in mind. Charger Connection and the monthly eblasts that admissions sends are to prospective student’s parents. The monthly e-mail that goes to all parents we have e-mail addresses for is separate from the student’s with tips. Social Media (and any communication tool for that matter) is about building relationships.

That’s the view that parents like to hear: a partner in the family’s college search. With this view, both parent and student feel valuable; and this translates into the college providing a positive environment for making the right college choice.

University of New Haven has created an extremely helpful parent’s guide: Parents Guide to College and Financial Planning. They cover every topic that a parent needs to know about college choices and financial planning; also giving advice on how to help your student survive the first year of college. This guide communicates that partnership that Gil talked about and emanates through his social media persona.

I hope you will take a look at the University of New Haven and even view their parent’s guide. Here are the links to connect with them online:

University of New Haven

UNewHaven Facebook Page

UNewHaven Twitter Account

college guidance, college planning, parenting

That all-important college deal-breaker

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college student
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been having conversations on Twitter about the emotional aspect of choosing a college.

As a parent of two teens who headed off to college, this is no surprise. My daughter’s college deal-breaker had nothing to do with academics or college rankings. From the time she was small, she wanted to go to college in Boston. Coming from Texas, that was a bit of a surprise–especially since she had never visited Boston. But when college decision time came around, Bentley College beat out SMU because of location. My son’s college deal-breaker came when a buddy of his in the Marine Corps told him a college in Texas had “hot chicks”.

I also heard a college student say she transferred freshman year because another school had a sink in the freshmen dorm rooms. That has to be the first time I’ve ever heard that described as a college deal-breaker!

While parents are thinking academics and cost, their college-bound teens have that deal-breaker in mind. It might be Greek life, or the fact that it’s the #1 party school. But trust me, there’s a deal-breaker in the back of their head. And you might be surprised to find out what it is. All this time you thought they were looking for a college with an excellent engineering program, they really wanted a college where the girls outnumbered the boys!

What does this mean for you as a parent? Talk to your college-bound teen. Find out what their deal-breaker is and help them choose a perfect-fit college that addresses it. There’s nothing wrong with having a deal-breaker, but it’s your job to guide them to find the college that makes them happy and provides them with an education that benefits them in the future. If the college with the sink in the dorm rooms also values your teen and offers an excellent program in her chosen field of finance, you’ve found that “perfect fit” college!

college guidance, college planning, financial aid, parenting, Uncategorized

Being realistic about college debt

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It’s been in the news lately and it came up in a #CollegeBound chat yesterday: graduating with too much student loan debt. I wanted to lend my voice to the topic today and give parents something to think about and use in the future.

As I have said previously, I have a unique perspective in the college admissions process. As a parent, I’ve experienced all the frustration first-hand: the decisions about choices, the dilemma over financing, and the anxiety related to waiting for the final decisions. Something I haven’t talked about is how to handle making the final college choice when the acceptance letters and financial aid packages arrive. This can make a difference in the amount of debt your child graduates with and how it affects their life after college. Especially if you are unable to contribute to financing that education.

Case in point: my daughter’s decision to attend her “plan B or 2nd choice” college. After being accepted to her 1st choice/reach school, we waited for the financial aid award to arrive. In the meantime, awards from the other colleges she had applied to filtered in. She was offered a full-ride scholarship at one school, 80% of her financial need was met at two of the other colleges with grants and scholarships, and some small grants and loans from the rest of her college choices. Her 1st choice college met 0% of her financial need. Her heart was broken.

Here is where parenting comes into play. She wanted to attend her 1st choice college–her heart was set on it. She had been dreaming of it her whole life and any other option was out of the question. But, in order to attend, it would require financing the expensive education with loans (student and parent). While every fiber in me wanted to say YES, my common sense knew it would be a financial disaster. I sat her down, explained why she couldn’t go to her dream college, and she listened (while crying, of course). It might have broken both our hearts at the time, but it was the BEST decision for her in the long run.

To make a long story short, she fell in love with her Plan B college. It was smaller and offered a much better environment for her academically and socially. Most importantly, the college WANTED HER; as evidenced by their willingness to give her financial aid. They valued her contribution to the student body and from the moment she set foot on campus, she felt wanted. But the real payoff came when she graduated with only a small amount of college debt, being able to easily pay back the consolidated loans. Had she attended her 1st choice college, she would have graduated with close to $100,000 in debt, burdening her for years.

The bottom line:

  • Make wise financial choices about student loan debt.
  • Evaluate the financial aid packages and always consider the BEST offer.
  • Even if it’s disappointing for your child, you MUST be a parent and explain the consequences of graduating with too much college debt.
  • Disappointments are much easier to deal with than being saddled with debt after graduation.

If you liked this article, you might also like:

Choices. Choices. Choices.

Checking the “no financial aid needed” box

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Can that long-distance relationship survive?



Today’s guest post from The Real College Guide editors gives some positive input on the pros and cons of long-distance relationships. My daughter ended her senior year of high school “in love” and even questioned going off to college. Under my STRONG advice, she did go away and eventually they grew apart. Neither was ready for a serious relationship and in the long run, it was best for both of them. If your c0llege-bound teen is facing this issue, this article should help make the right decision.

*******

Prep yourself for the separation — and “the talk” — with a plan to leave your relationship when you leave for school.

I have to start this article with a confession: I was the kid who broke up with his high school girlfriend before taking off for college, and no, it was not my most sensitive, sterling moment. In fact, the sting stuck around even after I settled into college life, when it finally hit me: I didn’t want our relationship to end. I was pretty fortunate that my ex-girlfriend agreed to reconcile, but unfortunately, not everyone is so lucky.

So, before making any sudden adjustments to your Facebook status, take some time to consider your options — and we’re not talking about the many ready-to-mingle singles on campus. Whether you’re leaning toward staying together, breaking it off or testing the waters of an open relationship, here’s what you need to know before “the talk”:

Keep It Together
Last season on MTV’s “The City,” fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg doled out this gem to the reality show’s star Whitney Port: “Absence is to love what the wind is to fire. When it’s a small fire, the wind kills it. But when it’s a real fire, it intensifies it.” True?

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder for a while, but if it keeps up, the emotional distance grows,” says Mira Kirshenbaum, author of When Good People Have Affairs: Inside the Hearts and Minds of People in Two Relationships. “Love is about intimacy, connection, the experience of the other’s voice and smell and touch. The kind of lifestyle in which couples don’t have time for each other is an anti-intimacy machine.”

Staying in touch–Tools like Google Talk, video chat, email and texting make it convenient to bridge the distance in your relationship. (FYI: My girlfriend and I set time aside every day, even if it’s just a few minutes, to talk on the phone or face-to-face via Skype, and it works for us.) The key is to first commit to making the effort. Then, work to strike a balance between staying involved in each other’s lives and smothering each other. And no, we’re not saying this is easy.

Seeing each other –Finding time — and money — to meet in person is a challenge, especially without a car. Like many long-distance college relationships, mine began in high school, so there’s the benefit of visiting at home during breaks. If you don’t share a hometown, you’ll need to take turns visiting each other at school. Advance planning goes a long way in strengthening your relationship by giving you something to look forward to. And remember: Even in the middle of nowhere, when there’s a will there’s a way — it’s called public transportation.

Bigger issues– Besides maintaining contact while apart, the biggest challenge is retaining trust. Temptation is inevitable when you are on your own and living in a bubble filled with kids your age. “The best predictors of infidelity are opportunity and unhappiness, and this is what is created when one partner is away,” says Kirshenbaum. “If one of you discovers the other has cheated, this is the relationship equivalent of someone having a coronary. But the best antidote to suspicions that something might be going on is to spend time together, be more intimate and continually try to make your relationship better.” Easier said than done, right? Which is why some people opt for …

The Open Relationship
College students have wildly varying perspectives when it comes to arrangements in which couples, though in a primary relationship, are free to date others. Those in open relationships often struggle with jealousy and insecurity, but it can be a temporary solution that won’t leave either of you feeling confined — or heartbroken from a full-on breakup.

“It’s perfectly natural to explore the boundaries of fidelity in a new environment with new people,” says Harvard sophomore Chase Carpenter. “I think open relationships can be difficult and vague, but if both parties are trusting and relaxed, they can be fantastic.”

Peers on pros –College of Charleston sophomore Alex Crowley identifies what she sees as a benefit: “It’s nice to be able to talk to someone like you’re in a relationship even though there might not be a full commitment.”

Peers on cons– “I’ve never met someone who’s been in [an open relationship], but it sounds like a load of crap,” says Georgetown University junior Molly Redden. “You’re either with someone or you’re not. Getting back together when you’re at home doesn’t count as a relationship. Even if you talk every day, if you’re casually seeing or sleeping with other people, I don’t see how you’re still dating the guy back home.”

So, enter an open relationship with caution, unless you choose to …

Break It off
In some instances, it may be appropriate to break things off. If you and your significant other will be hundreds of miles apart and unable to visit for extended periods of time, let’s be real: Attempting to sustain a healthy relationship is borderline unrealistic. Maybe you want to be free to have the total college experience, and for you, that includes the prospect of hooking up. Or perhaps after trying the long-distance thing, you realize it’s just not working out the way you’d planned.

Dealing with it –Breaking up is never easy. Even if you know it’s the right decision, expect emotions of grief and loss. “Don’t mistake grief for love,” Susan J. Elliott, author of Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss Into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You, warns on her blog (search: Getting Past Your Past). “It’s normal to grieve. Don’t let grief cause you to second-guess your feelings.”

Distancing yourself –Elliott recommends a no-contact rule. “Even if you still love him or her, you don’t have to act on it,” she advises. “Grief is a hard process, and often, contact will seem like it temporarily alleviates the pain. But it just postpones the inevitable.”

college guidance, college planning, extracurricular activities, parenting

My kids need to volunteer…HELP!

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A mother on Facebook a few weeks ago asked for some volunteer suggestions from the Facebook community. Of course, there are the obvious: hospitals, local charities, beach clean-up, etc. But what if your teen isn’t interested in any of these options? If they aren’t interested, odds are they won’t stay with it.

Where do you go to find some unknown volunteer opportunities? Thanks to WhatGives.com and Chris Noble, here’s a good list of sites that might help you find the best volunteer fit for your college-bound teen:

Hands On Network: With 250 action centers around the country, it’s easy to connect and get started with a volunteer opportunity that fits your schedule and location.  Plus, they’ll occasionally partner with corporations like Disney to offer special incentives for volunteering.

Do Something: Focused more on teen activism and engagement with causes, their site offers “Virtual Volunteer” opportunities so you can take action without leaving your couch!

US Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD): Interested in volunteering in our National Parks?  For the Smithsonian?  Start here.   You’ll find a host of ways to volunteer alongside existing government programs.  The HUD site also lists opportunities to provide technology access and job training to those who need it on a volunteer basis.

VolunteerMatch: One of the largest online databases for volunteering, where over 71,000 nonprofits have listed local and regional events and projects.

Go Abroad: Want to volunteer on vacation?  Fulfill your travel bug and your need to do good at the same time by applying for one of the nearly 6,000 “Volunteer Abroad” opportunities from more than 1,300 organizations around the world.

iParticipate: Follow the stars.  Literally.  The Entertainment Industry Foundation launched this project with Ashton Kutcher, Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Katie Couric (and many others) in a campaign designed to encourage Americans to consider volunteering as an integral part of our national identity.

Serve.Gov: One year old today, this site and associated initiatives were created by the Serve America Act.  One of its purposes is to help Americans get back to work by building skills and connections through volunteer opportunities.

Every college expert will tell you that volunteering is an integral part of the high school resume. Summer is the BEST time to start on that volunteer journey. But remember…one day here and there does not a volunteer make! Consistency over the course of your teen’s high school career shows a level of commitment to the cause and a willingness to give back.

If you liked this, you might also like to read:

Summertime is Volunteer Time

My Top 10 Summer Activities

college guidance, college planning, parenting

Top 10 Things to do BEFORE college

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Today’s post is by Lauren Joffe for The Real College Guide. While I agree with MOST of the suggestions, I’d like to add my “input” on the #9-Get Protection. Parents–talk with your college-bound teen about sex. They are going to be confronted with it (even if they choose to abstain). They need to understand the risks involved in “hooking up” and they need to understand that they ALWAYS have choices. Heading off to college is a daunting task for both parents and teens. Pass this list along to your teenager and use it as an opportunity for a heart-to-heart BEFORE they are on their own and independent.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Hasta la vista, Mom and Dad. Hello, independence … but wait! Not so fast. Before you hit the road and leave your parentals behind, make sure you’re fully prepared for your new life of unwavering autonomy by spending your summer days wisely. Here, 10 things to do before you bolt. Ready, set …

1. Check up on your computer

New computers rarely come with programs like Microsoft Office, which you’ll definitely need, so be sure to purchase before you’re stuck handwriting your first assignment. And if you’re using an older comp, make sure it’s ready to take the heat: Since you will be on it all the time, install any updates or think about an upgrade. Also, find out if your school offers wireless Internet access (and if your computer is compatible) or whether you’ll need an Ethernet cable. Note: Some schools prohibit users without spyware or virus protection from connecting to the network. So, seriously, get the deets!

2. Make nice with your new dorm mate

As if you need us to tell you, check out her Facebook or MySpace page so you can get a feel for what you’re in for. Then buckle down and dial her digits for a quick chat to break the ice. Ask if there’s anything you should be aware of (like her fatal allergy to dusk or fear of the dark) and let her know of any immediate concerns you might have (like the fact that you can’t live without cable, and you’re relying on her to bring the big screen).

3. Do it up at a discount department store

Knock out the staples on your to-buy list before the selection is sold out: sheets, towels, toiletries and storage containers. But also pick up the following often-forgotten items you do not want to leave home without:

  • One-cup coffeemaker Brew your own instead of wasting a whole meal swipe for a cup o’ joe from the dining hall or blowing wads of money at Starbucks.
  • Mattress pad Make your dorm cot as comfy as the cushy oasis you’re used to at home while protecting yourself from whatever lived on your bed before you.
  • Rubber flip-flops Save yourself from the foot infections, clumps of hair and other mysterious masses that live in your communal shower.
  • Power strip Surge-protect your PC while hooking up your iPod station and hair dryer all at once.

4. Secure your class schedule

Enrollment deadlines are not meant to be ignored. In fact, the earlier you sit down to set your schedule, the better your course selection will be — so definitely don’t wait until the last minute. Also, pay attention to class restrictions, since some courses may require department approval ahead of time.

5. Plan your budget

Living costs at college range from campus to campus — the amount of money you’ll need largely depends on the location of your campus (cities can be more expensive) and the choices you make (like ordering in instead of suffering one more dining hall meal). Extra expenses will include social costs (movies, concerts, game tickets, cover for some parties), toiletries, food and drink beyond your meal plan, and transportation. Ask an upperclassman or student advisor how much cash she spends on average each week. Then pool your summer savings to determine whether you can cover your own expenses. If you need help, ask your parents or start looking for a part-time job on campus — before you get there.

6. Visit your school’s Web site

Your university may offer registration guides, campus news and summertime get-to-know-each-other sessions that you definitely do not want to miss out on — especially if you’re in the habit of throwing college junk mail in the trash (which is where important info may very well be). Plus, seeing your campus colors on the screen will psych you up — or at the very least, calm your nerves and get you into the spirit.

7. Get packing

Whether you’re shipping all your stuff UPS or loading up the car and driving cross-country, don’t leave packing to the last minute, when you’ll want to laze around and hang out with friends you won’t be seeing for a while. Designate an area of your house or bedroom to stow things you buy especially for college or things you don’t use daily but know you’ll need to take. Do not overpack! The amount of space you will have in your new room is likely much smaller than your current living quarters. Only bring what’s necessary, as your parents can always mail any left-behind belongings.

8. Put together a tool kit

Once you’re at school on your own, you’ll be shocked how often you’ll need a pair of scissors or a screwdriver — even if you’ve never used one. If you need to hang a poster or fix a loose screw, a simple, handy kit will be of great use when you least expect it. Bring a little box with a screwdriver (both Phillips and flathead), hammer, pliers, nails and screws. An inexpensive small cordless drill/screw gun is a good investment too. Pack scissors as well as adhesives, like sticky tack and tape, with your desk stuff.

9. Get protection

There’s no harm in being prepared for safe sex even if you have no particular plan or person in mind with whom to have it.

10. Hang with your high school pals

You know you’re going to miss your hometown friends, especially during the first few weeks you are apart. Yeah, you’ll make a whole slew of new friends. But make some memories first by hanging with the crew this summer.