Category Archives: parenting

life lessons, parenting

Parent Tip Week: Raising an Independent Student

independent student

So much time is spent preparing for the actual college choice and application that very little time and effort goes into prepping for these valuable life skills. They may be prepared for the academic rigors of college, but neglecting to prepare for all the other aspects of college life might affect your success and ultimate degree completion. It’s your role as a parent to make sure they have these skills before they leave for college.

We must, as parents, raise an independent student. That means they must know how to self-advocate. They must know how to say “no” to behaviors that have negative consequences. They must be responsible with their time and their money. It’s no easy task and in today’s world, we have to add the ability to make wise social and economic choices.

Financial skills

When your student heads off to college there will be many financial decisions they need to make, beginning with how much student loan debt they are willing to incur. Use loan repayment calculators to determine the amount of re-payments after graduation and use these figures to make wise decisions about loans. They will also need to know how to budget their money in regards to other college costs such as books, living expenses and entertainment. Add to that the knowledge of credit card rates and how easily it is to fall into debt using them for simple things such as pizza. Many students graduate from college with over $10,000 in credit card debt.

Social skills

If your student is headed off to college to hook up with the party scene, they are in for a rude awakening when their first semester grades are released. Many students forget that partying affects their study time and class attendance. If they are exhausted from partying the night before, they are less likely to get up for that early class. Recognize that while making friends and enjoying the social scene are necessary for their overall satisfaction of the college experience, they should not forget the reason they came to college: to get an education. Discuss with them how to balance their social life with their academic life before they leave in the fall.

Academic skills

College is not like high school. Professors expect that your student do their assignments and they don’t check up on you if you don’t. Coming to college with refined study and organization skills will help your student adjust to the rigorous course requirements of a college degree program. Managing their time is also important as it relates to class assignments, studying for tests and preparing term papers.

Mental skills

College life produces a whole new set of mental and emotional problems. Many students face homesickness early and should recognize that those feelings are normal. They should go to college with the skills needed to cope with stress and the feeling of loneliness that often occurs. Recognize that all these factors contribute to their overall mental health and know beforehand where they can find help if they need it.

Problem solving skills

College is no different than life—obstacles occur on a daily basis and you will need the skills to deal with those obstacles. Your student will be confronted with conflict and should know how to resolve that conflict, either by themselves or with a mediator (such as an RA or student advisor). They will face situations that require them to advocate and they should be comfortable doing this before they head off to college and become completely independent.

The question we should all be asking our students is:

Are you prepared for college?

I’m not talking about academic, extracurriculars, or standardized tests. I’m talking about the “real” college prep: adulthood. Because this is the most important college prep of all. If your student isn’t ready to study without being constantly nagged, attend class without a wake-up call, or make wise choices when every negative influence in the world bombards them, then he or she is not ready for college.

Do you have a to-do list for your future college student? Can they live within a budget? Do they understand the importance of study and class attendance? Do they know how to choose the right friends? Will they make wise choices about alcohol, sex and other risky behaviors. Preparing them for college is so much more than academics.

Get this book: Toward College Success: Is Your Teenager Ready, Willing and Able? Read it and apply its tactics. When your student goes off to college they will be prepared for the real world which can sometimes be cruel; but a learning environment preparing them for adulthood.

parenting, scholarships

Parent Tip Week: How to Help with Scholarships

help with scholarships

Most parents want their student to win scholarships. Even if you can afford to pay for college, free money is always welcome. But talk with parents and parent groups and you can hear the frustration:

  • My student isn’t motivated to search for scholarships.
  • My student has applied for so many scholarships and hasn’t won a dime.
  • Where do we search? Should we sign up on all the scholarship search engines?

But the number one questions parents ask is:

How can I help my student search and apply for scholarships?

Here are just a few ways parents can help with scholarships and scholarship applications:

Help with organization

Your student will need an organized system to help with the scholarship search and application process. You can help! Encourage your student to set up Google docs for scholarships with the name of the scholarship, requirements, due dates, and information needed for each.

As you find scholarships, you can add to the list that will be easily accessible to you and your student. This will also help you stay on top of deadlines so you can quickly text a reminder to your student.

Help with searching

You can help your student search for scholarships. While you are waiting in just about any line, you can use your smartphone to search. You can use Google or there are apps available to help you search.

Watch the news, look at community bulletin boards, talk to family and friends and search local organizations for scholarship opportunities. You can keep a notebook with you, or just open the Google doc and add the scholarships you find.

Help with proofreading

You can’t write their essays or fill out their applications, but you can proofread and double check the requirements before your student applies.

Help with reminders

Email or text your student when deadlines are approaching to remind them to submit the application on time. With so many things to do, it’s hard for students to stay on top of deadlines.

admissions, parenting

Parent Tip Week: Dealing With Disappointment

dealing with disappointment

In high school, my son participated in the Navy Junior Reserve Officers Training Corps program and had high hopes of attending a military academy after graduation. However, due to less-than-stellar SAT scores and our family’s general lack of understanding about how the application process worked, he was denied admission to all of them. It was difficult dealing with disappointment.

If you’re the parent of a high school senior whose sights are set on a dream college, you don’t want to anticipate dealing with disappointment. But you also know that, given the competitive and subjective nature of college admissions, rejection is possible…even likely.

I have a colleague who won’t call it “rejection” — he has dubbed the two decisions students receive an “offer of admission” and “no offer of admission.” Language like this might ease the blow somewhat, but your teen will not be comforted. The disappointment will be enormous, and real.

How do you handle your own feelings?

First of all, be ready. Those disappointments are on their way and even if you vow not to take a rejection personally (after all, you’re not the one applying to college) it’s nearly impossible not to. This is your child; you are bound up in his sorrows and joys. And his application was stellar! “How can they reject my student?” you will wonder in outrage, speculating about who may have gotten in instead and taken “his” spot. Suddenly you realize that you, too, had pinned hopes on a future that included Parents’ Weekend on a certain idyllic campus.

When we acknowledge our own disappointment, we can make sure it stays where it belongs — in our own hearts. The last thing we want is to magnify our student’s pain. He feels badly enough already without feeling that he has disappointed his parents.

How do you support your student’s feelings?

Every student reacts differently. Some will shrug off the rejection letters, understanding that it is just part of the process, but others will view a rejection (or two or three) as the end of the world. At the moment that your student is absorbing this news, all the truisms in the world (“Everything happens for a reason,” “It’ll work out,” “You don’t want to go there if they don’t want you,” etc.) won’t help. Hold him, hug him, and let him know that you share his pain. He needs time to express his emotions and deal with the disappointment in his own way.

What do you do after you’ve both had time to grieve?

Once some time has passed and your student is able to be objective, embrace the life lessons. Point out that disappointments often turn into opportunities (it shouldn’t be too hard to dig up some examples from your own life!). Assure him that success in college is more about his attitude than the name on the T-shirt, and even though College “A” didn’t work out, there is a place for him — a terrific school where he is wanted and where he will thrive. On that note, move on to the colleges that mailed the fat envelopes. If there is more than one, he now has the fun task of making a choice. He’s back in the driver’s seat.

When my son was turned down by the military academies, he turned to Plan B and enlisted in the U.S. Marines. After four years of service and the passage of time, he saw himself in a new light. He applied to college, was accepted, and graduated with honors. Back when he was a high school senior, the rejections seemed momentous. Later, he recognized that they had been merely a bump in the road and an opportunity to re-evaluate his goals.

admissions, college guidance, college prep, parenting

Parent Tip Week: Parenting for College

parenting for college

It’s hard. I know. I’ve been there. You want your student to have the BEST education available. You want them to want it as much as you do. You see them making some choices that you know they will regret. As hard as you try, you find yourself pressuring them to make the right choice and the battle lines are drawn. They dig their heels in. You dig your heels in. And the tug of war begins.

What’s a parent to do when you feel your college-bound teens are making the wrong choices related to college? Take a deep breath and read these examples (along with my suggestions). Parenting for college can and probably will be a struggle.

Your college-bound teen tells you he doesn’t want to go to the college that is hard to get into and is opting for what you consider to be sub par.

Don’t panic or overreact. It’s possible he is scared. Try and ascertain the reasoning behind the decision. Don’t do this by badgering him or constantly asking him why. The best way to figure out what is wrong is to LISTEN. Listen to him talk about his day, about college, about how he feels. If fear is not the reason, perhaps he feels the other college would be a better fit. If that’s the case, do yourself a favor and back off. The worst thing you can do with a teenager is force him into a decision he feels is wrong. Sometimes the best lessons we learn are the ones that come from making our own decisions (right or wrong).

Your college-bound teen tells you that he simply MUST go to Private College A, even though she knows it comes with a high price tag.

Don’t let her bully you into sending her to a college you can’t afford AND one that will require a tremendous amount of student loan debt. Sit her down and explain to her the dangers of graduating in debt. Use the college repayment calculators if you have to. If she truly wants to go to Private College A, she needs to do the work (good grades, good SAT/ACT scores, great essay) to be awarded scholarship/grant money from that college.

It’s also worth considering that a private college may be similar in cost to a public university. Since many private colleges have generous alumni that donate, they often award large merit scholarships. Public universities are not as generous with aid.

Your college-bound teen is not interested in college, deadlines, studying for the SAT or any other path that leads him toward higher education.

If there is one thing I learned with both of my kids (and clients), if they aren’t invested in the college process they won’t be invested in college. Save yourself some time, money and heartache and wait until they are. If not, they can learn from the college of hard knocks–minimum wage jobs are the BEST motivator!

It’s also important to note that not every student is meant for college. There are, indeed, other options. Many have taken those different paths and been perfectly successful and happy. It could be time to consider alternatives to college.

Your college-bound teen misses deadlines, panics and comes running to you at the last minute to fix it.

The simplest way I know to avoid missing deadlines, is to get yourself a huge wall calendar and a fat red marker. Put it in a place that they have to pass by every single day. In addition, with all the smartphones and calendar apps available today, missing a deadline should be a thing of the past. At some point (hopefully when they go to college), they will have to fix their own problems. Let them do it now, while they live at home, and it will be easier for them once they are gone. Rescuing your kids all time only makes them into dependent adults and colleges aren’t impressed with those type of students or the parents that come with them.

Your college-bound teen suddenly announces she is not ready for college and wants to take a year off.

First of all, wait. Don’t react. Just listen. Odds are the mood will change with the wind and once all her friends are making college plans, that desire that she once had will kick back in. If not, let her know that it won’t be a “free-ride” year.

With the pandemic, gap years are becoming prevalent. Your student can use the time to investigate career options, work at an internship, volunteer in the community, or simply work and save money toward college.

If you have any questions or personal experiences you would like to share, please leave a comment here and share it with other parents. We learn from each other and from our mistakes and successes!

admissions, college prep, parenting

Parent Tip Week: Parenting in Today’s World

parenting

The world we now live in is resoundingly different than the world we grew up in. Applying to college has become the norm and parents and students take it seriously. The competition to get into college can be overwhelming at times for both parents and students.

Parenting has changed

In the 50’s, our parents let us have the run of the neighborhood. We rode our bikes everywhere, walked home from school alone, and rode the bus to the movies alone. In the summer, we left the house early in the morning and returned home in time for dinner. Our teachers terrified us and we knew if we misbehaved, our parents would back them up. There were no car seats or safety belts. You would never find anti-bacterial soap or even consider using it. When we turned 18, we either went to college or got a full-time job and moved out of the house.

In the 80’s, parenting styles

began to change. Because of Adam Walsh, we watched our kids like a hawk. We weren’t quite ready to take away their freedom, but we worried. We worried about where they were, who they were with, and what dangers they might encounter when they were at school, outside, and at the mall. Parents began to question a teacher’s authority and loosened the grip on the discipline of their children. Spanking became taboo and “time out” emerged as a parenting technique.

At the beginning of the 21st century helicopter parenting emerged. It’s not like we planned for it to happen. It just did. We sheltered our children from any disappointment. Everyone on the team got a trophy. There were no winners or losers. We questioned all school authority. We would never consider letting them walk home alone or play outside without supervision. If they forgot their lunch, we took it to them. If they left their homework at home, we took it to school. We began to make every decision for them and protect them from every consequence. We began to feel the “parent peer pressure” for our children to be the best and the greatest. If they graduated from college and couldn’t find a job, they came home to live and thus the term “boomerang” generation was born.

How do you walk the tightrope of helicopter parenting?

How do we raise our children in this frightening world without overprotecting them from the disappointments and trials of life? What are the long-term risks of helicopter parenting?

Combine a little of the 50’s parenting, some of the 80’s style of parenting, and a very small amount of the 21st century parenting for the perfect parenting balance. There’s a fine line between cautious parenting and being a helicopter mom.

Ask yourself this question–Do you want your children to be independent successful adults or do you want them living in your basement for years and years depending on you to pay their bills and take care of them? Is it conceivable they will be going off to college and surviving alone, or calling you every day crying for help, or needing assistance with every life task? Will they be running home because they simply can’t survive without you?

My guess–your answers to every one of these questions would be a resounding NO! 

Guest Posts, parenting

Talking to College-Bound Teens About Risky Behavior

risky behavior

You’re likely to feel a little anxious about the idea of your teen going off to college. Your years of being able to protect and coddle your child are about to end, and you know how cruel the world can be. 

One fear that you might have about your teen going off to college is that of drug and alcohol abuse. Many teens face problems such as peer pressure and the need to fit in with the “everybody’s doing it” crowd. 

Here are some tips for talking to your teen about the dangers of succumbing to peer pressure and risky behavior in college.

Continue reading Talking to College-Bound Teens About Risky Behavior →
financial planning, parenting

Teaching Financial Independence Before College

financial independence

For parents, preparing their kids for college can be a stressful time. While they are getting excited to meet new people, decorate their dorm, and pack everything for their first year on campus, parents are often focused on the nitty-gritty details. This often involves preparing their children’s finances and filling out paperwork among many other things.

As a parent, it’s important to make sure your child knows about the responsibilities they’ll need to handle in college. Helping them understand money management is especially important, as this will help them be better prepared for when they graduate. Here are some first steps to help teach your child financial independence before college.

Determine an Organization Method

Working on developing a budget with your child who is college-bound can help them be better prepared to manage their money and avoid overspending. Generally, your kids will have a limited amount of money each semester depending on what they’ve saved up, and if they have any type of financial aid or work-study income.

To help them create a budget, work with them to calculate the expenses they expect to have each semester, along with how much money they will have to spend. Write down each of these by category, and then determine how to best allocate their money. Generally, you should create categories that distinguish between necessities and other non-necessities, with a priority on payments that are not negotiable such as food, textbooks, and school supplies, as opposed to non-negotiable payments such as parties and socialization.

In order for your child to best track their budget in college, they could utilize a digital budgeting app so that they can always have a handle on their money whenever they’re on the go.

Set Up Financial Accounts

Getting your child’s financial situation in order also involves helping them get a bank account, among other financial accounts such as credit cards and loan accounts. If they don’t already have one, getting them a savings and checking account is a great way to help them be fully in control of their money.

One great way of doing this is by helping them sign up for a digital banking platform, which can allow them to control their finances from their laptop or mobile device. These often have additional features that can help them be more financially responsible, such as automatic savings and fee-free overdraft protection. These services can help students save money during the semester and contribute to their life savings over time.

Remember, they will also need to set up accounts with different service companies too including water companies. That’s why it’s important to make sure that you are exploring companies like American Water with your kids so that they can make informed decisions about their suppliers.

Discuss Credit and Loans

Finally, helping your child understand debt, credit, and loans will keep them from acquiring a low credit score throughout college or falling behind on student loan payments. Discuss with them the importance of meeting any credit card payments they have on time and paying them off immediately instead of letting the debt pile up.

You should also explain how much money they will owe for student loans and what they will need to do to pay these off after graduation. This will give them a better sense of their financial responsibilities and motivate them to be on top of their finances. You can go about this by giving them access to their student loan accounts and helping them stay aware of how much they will end up owing after graduation.

Overall, knowledge about debt and loans will come with the added benefits of motivating them to be more financially independent, so that they will be in a better position when they graduate. They may even work to find ways to avoid debt while in college, and in some cases, they can even begin to pay off loans while still in college.

Helping your child prepare to become financially independent is tricky, especially since they’re getting ready to go into a new environment. However, by teaching them the right skills, they’ll be prepared to manage their money and stay financially savvy in no time.

college planning, parenting, Uncategorized

Parenting for College in Today’s World

parenting for college

How do school administrators describe today’s parent?

Has it become so bad that school administrators (from grade school to college) have to label us (helicopter parent, bulldozer parent, snowplow parent)? Apparently, it has. When it comes right down to it, we should realize that this type of behavior only hurts the student. Of course, the student may not see the harm. After all, their parent is rescuing them from difficult situations in life. But in the long run, it hurts their quest for independence and causes strife within the family.

Let’s take a look at some of these parenting styles and ask yourself how they can hinder your student’s growth toward independence and influence your parenting for college.

The Helicopter Parent

A helicopter parent hovers over their child. They keep tabs on their every move, text them 24 hours a day and have tracking apps on their smartphones to keep track of their child’s location at all times. Helicopter parents are ready to swoop in at a moment’s notice to help their child in any situation. Forgot their lunch—they take off at lunch to bring it to them. Forgot to bring a permission slip—they drop everything and bring it to them. Forgot to register for the SAT—no, problem; we’ll pay the late fee. Receive a text or non-emergency call during a meeting—they drop everything to respond. Overslept for school—they write a note to explain the tardiness.

The Snowplow Parent

The snowplow parent goes beyond the hovering. They clear paths for their children and plow any obstacle that stands in the way of their happiness. Their children never learn how to advocate for themselves and head off to college to get lost in a sea of problems. As they get older, it’s harder for them to resolve conflict and overcome adversity. Honestly, I have to admit I did this with my daughter. The good news—I knew when to stop. The bad news—I did it much too long.

The Bulldozer Parent

A bulldozer parent is one who is involved in their child’s life, especially in school. This type of parent calls the teacher to complain about a grade they feel is undeserved. As their kids get older, they call the admissions office to plead their college-bound teen’s case for admittance. Bulldozer parents bulldoze their way into their kid’s lives. If their kids get into trouble, they are right there waiting to bail them out and make excuses.

Evaluate and adjust

Be honest. Haven’t you been guilty of some of these? As with any problem you have to want to stop. You have to examine your parenting style and decide whether or not you are helping or hindering your kids. And once you determine the problem you should make an effort to correct it. Back off a bit, give your kids some space, and allow them to make mistakes and learn from them.

Always remember that an independent adult will be a functioning adult and a happier adult. You may say now you don’t want them to grow up, but when they are asking for your help at 30 you will be sorry you encouraged their dependence.

It’s no surprise that parents have become so involved in their kids’ lives that school administrators have begun to label us; helicopter parent, snow plow parent, and bulldozer parent. But it can’t all be bad; after all, parents are actually involved. Is this a bad thing? As with anything there are extremes. And it’s possible that a few bad parenting experiences have shed a negative light on all of us.

Let’s take a look at the benefits of helicopter parenting:

Parents who are involved tend to have academically successful students.

Studies show kids who have parents that stay involved from Kindergarten to 12th grade are more likely to excel academically. Why? Involved parents help students with studies, organization and make sure they do their assignments. They also stay on top of grades and can recognize any problems that may require extra help.

Parents who are involved have students who are less likely to participate in at-risk behaviors.

Students whose parents are involved in their lives are going to find it harder to participate in at-risk behaviors. Why? Parents who know their kid’s friends, encourage activities at home, and encourage their kids to participate in after school activities help the kids learn responsibility and commitment. They have little time to get into trouble.

Parents who are invested financially and encourage their students to invest financially have students who take their education seriously.

College is a large financial commitment. When parents commit to invest, and insist that their student invest, the student will be more likely to see the value of that investment. That translates into academic success and a successful college education.

My mother used to say, “Don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater.” I think that is the best way to look at helicopter parenting. Embrace the good things about this type of parenting and avoid the behaviors that cause educators to label us.

college prep, parenting

Early Preparation for College

This article was originally written for TeenLife Magazine.

college

With competition for college admission becoming stronger, parents are recognizing the need to begin college prep early. That doesn’t mean that you start drilling college into your toddler’s head (although some parents have been known to do this). It does mean that you begin a foundation for their education that will carry them into high school and eventually into college.

Looking at the three phases of education, what should parents do to prepare their students for college?

Elementary School

When discussing college prep, most of the discussions start in middle school and the steps begin when a student is in high school. But for a student to be truly prepared for college, parents should begin talking about it, thinking about it, and discussing it as early as elementary school.

Start talking about the value of education

Begin talking about the importance of education when your child enters kindergarten. The first seven years of education are filled with learning fundamental skills and gaining knowledge. This is the foundation of all future education. If your child loves school, excels in school, and is motivated to study and achieve excellence, the logical progression will be to continue their education by going to college.

Start talking about college

The opportunities that a college education provides can be relayed to your children during the early years of education.

For example, if your child is interested in dinosaurs, parents should talk about how people that research and recover dinosaur bones had to go to college first to learn how it’s done. Or if he is interested in space, discuss how scientists and astronauts go to college to learn the skills they need to work in that field. A child’s enthusiasms are the perfect opportunities to start a discussion about how college is key to pursuing and following those interests.

Visit colleges with the family

Visiting college isn’t just for teenagers. Many universities provide campus tours and visiting days when a staff member will guide a grade school class, or other group of children, around the campus and explain the unique and exciting things they can do when they grow up and go to college. Parents can also schedule outings with their children to the college or university from which they graduated. The important thing is to make college sound interesting, exciting and accessible.

Middle School

In a Forbes article about preparing for college, Director of Admissions MaeBrown said, “Start preparing for college at grade six. ”That’s when parents and students should increase the focus on the final goal after high school graduation: college.

Start planning academics

Middle school students should begin planning their academic path that will carry into high school. Meet with the school counselor and discuss the courses that can be taken in middle school to prepare for high school, especially in the math and science categories. Many middle schools offer classes that were traditionally reserved for high school students. These math classes are required to take more advanced math classes in high school and to take science classes like chemistry and physics.

Because college work and many jobs now require computer skills, your child should also try to take advantage of any computer science classes offered in middle and high school. He’ll gain new skills and may discover a career path.

Read, read, read

Establish an environment at home that encourages reading. Students can start adding to their vocabulary by reading diversely. Tweens should be reading all types of books, articles, blogs and news articles. This increases their vocabulary, which is a strong component in essay writing and standardized tests. While you’re at it, why not make vocabulary building a family game by learning a word a day? There are lots of free subscription services that will email a word of the day.

Partner with your child’s educators

Middle school is the time parents tend to be less involved, but it’s the very time your child needs encouragement and guidance. Meet your child’s teachers, if you haven’t already done so, and make it clear that you want to be kept up to date about any changes in your child’s work or behavior.

Talk to the counselor about your child’s interests to see if there are electives and extracurricular activities that will help him develop his talents. If your child needs extra help or more challenging assignments in a subject, talk to the counselor about how to arrange it.

Start working on extracurriculars

A key ingredient in the college application is extracurriculars. Begin looking at areas that interest your child in middle school. Try out some volunteering, connect with a mentor for an internship, and explore hobbies and interests. If your child enters high school committed to one activity, it will be much easier to carry that through the next four years.

First Year of High School

It’s the year of new beginnings. Wide-eyed freshmen enter high school campuses overwhelmed on the one hand and excited on the other. High school puts them on the path to adulthood and independence. It means added responsibility and academic challenges, especially if they plan to apply to college at the beginning of their senior year.

Establish a relationship with the high school counselor

This is a person you want on your child’s team for the next few years in high school. The counselor will ask what your child envisions doing beyond high school; goals and vision for your child’s future career. They should help draw out a plan to reach those goals. If you wait until senior year, it could already be too late to get particular requirements your child may need to attend the school of his dreams. Work with your high school counselor ahead of time to pinpoint what school courses your child needs to take and pass to fit those college subjects the best. Sift through options of high school electives that match with the specific degree your child is interested in pursuing.

Research careers

By now, your teen should know what interests him in school. Is he drawn to the sciences? Or is drama his cup of tea? Does he excel in math? Or is he interested in literature? These interests will serve to guide your teen down the right career path.

It would be useless to pursue a career in the medical field if science and math are your teen’s least favorite subjects. It would also be frivolous to head down an acting career path if your teen does not like being on stage in front of people. Analyze their interests and strengths to guide them in choosing the career that would best suit them and feed their passion. Take personality and career tests and attend career days.

Plan a rigorous academic path

Throughout high school, your child will have the opportunity to get some college credit out of the way. At some universities, four years of a foreign language in high school will be enough to satisfy language requirements for your degree. Also, AP and honors classes can sometimes fulfill certain degree requirements, which will be very beneficial not only on the college application to communicate commitment to academics, but will also save you money paying for expensive college classes.

Research colleges

Finding a college that compliments your child’s educational goals, personality, and learning style takes time and effort. Start by making a list of what criteria the perfect school would have. From that list, focus on the schools that meet those needs with regard to location, size, character and degree programs.

Each academic year produces it’s own set of challenges if your child wants to go to college. By planning ahead, you can minimize the stress of senior year and ensure that your child is ready to pursue higher education after high school.

college guidance, parenting

Teaching Social Skills Before College

social skills

Social skills are important for all of us in day to day life. The vast majority of us are surrounded by other people at all times. We have to work with others. We socialize with others. We engage with people in countless situations on a day to day basis – buying items in stores, navigating ourselves through crowds in the streets, spending time with friends… the list goes on. So, social interaction is going to be a constant presence throughout your child’s entire life. Teaching them social skills before college is essential. They’ll settle into school, make friends, enjoy extracurricular activities and much more if they are able to effectively interact with the people they’re surrounded by. Here are a few areas to focus on to get your college-bound student ready for college.

Teach Communication

Communication is absolutely essential to getting by in the world. We all need to be able to express how we’re feeling in order to maintain good relationships with anyone. Without effective communication, your teen won’t be able to make friends well. So, encourage your child to talk. Get them to talk about how they’re feeling. Get them to talk about their interests. Get them to talk about what they’ve been up to and what they’re planning on doing each day. Simple conversation can go a long way when it comes to helping your teen express themselves and build bonds with others. You can find more information on how to achieve this at teachkidscommunication.

Teach Empathy

Empathy is another essential life skill. It will help your teen to understand how others feel at any given time. This will help them respond appropriately in different social situations. They will be able to help others when they’re feeling sad, down or distressed. They’ll be able to pick up on signs of anger and help to resolve the issues that are causing it. They’ll be able to share in others joy when others are happy or celebrating. Empathy really is important. But how do you teach empathy? Well, you simply actively encourage your child to see the world through another’s eyes or walk in another’s shoes. Ask them to consider how others such as their siblings or friends are feeling.

Lead by Example

Remember that your teen will pick up on your own social behavior, so lead by example and be a good role model. Make sure to treat others respectfully and appropriately at all times in front of your child. They’ll pick up on your behavior and begin to mimic it themselves!

Hopefully, the above advice will help you to help your soon-to-be college student when it comes to social skills! Focus on these different areas to get the best results possible!